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Dude, Apple is building JARVIS. And I am so f’ing down for it!

Writer: Rich WashburnRich Washburn

I mean, we’ve been stuck with these dumb voice assistants for way too long—Siri, Alexa, Google Assistant… they’re all basically glorified question-answer machines with the personality of a wet sponge. But now? Apple looks like they’re about to drop something that’s actually next level.


Apple’s Master Plan: JARVIS for Your House?


Here’s what’s cooking based on the latest leaks:


The Home Screen Hub – Imagine a HomePod with a built-in screen, kinda like an Amazon Echo Show, but way more Apple-y. Rumors say it’s got some detachable action too—so maybe an iPad Mini that docks and turns into a central command center for your whole house.


AI-Powered Security Cameras – Apple is allegedly working on their own smart security cameras, and unlike those Ring or Nest cams, these things will have real AI smarts—think facial recognition, pet detection, and actual intelligence instead of spamming you with “motion detected” every time a leaf blows by.


A Full Smart Home Takeover – We’re talking sensors, smart doorbells, thermostats, the whole shebang. Apple isn’t just dipping their toes in the smart home space anymore—they’re about to kick the damn door in and take over.


Apple Intelligence: The Brain Behind It All – If you’ve been paying attention, Apple is going all-in on AI, and this new smart home setup is probably gonna be stacked with on-device machine learning. That means better automation, smarter security alerts, and a home assistant that actually feels alive.


And Then… The ELEGNT Framework 🤯

This is where it gets straight-up sci-fi. Apple’s been working on expressive, non-humanoid robotics (think Pixar’s Luxo Jr. but smarter). Basically, they’ve developed a motion system that lets objects “express” emotions and intentions.


Imagine this:


  • You walk into your house, and your Apple assistant literally turns to look at you like, “Yo, what’s up?”

  • It can nod, shake its head, shift its "gaze"—not just respond with words but move in a way that makes it feel ALIVE.

  • It can gesture towards your coffee cup when it’s time for your caffeine fix, point at the window when it’s about to rain, or even dance along to your playlist while you cook.

  • Not just a smart speaker… but a smart presence.


Apple isn’t just making another smart home gadget—they’re building a freaking AI assistant that moves, reacts, and interacts like a real companion.


So… When Can I Get One?

Apple being Apple, they’ll probably take their sweet time perfecting this. Leaks suggest late 2025 or maybe even 2026, which sucks, but if they actually pull this off, it’ll be worth the wait.


And let’s be real—this is Apple. Their version of a home assistant won’t be cheap (I’m guessing $300–$350 for the screen thing and $100+ per AI camera), but if it actually delivers on this JARVIS-level experience, I don’t care—I’m throwing my money at it.


Dude, we’ve been waiting YEARS for something like this. If Apple really nails the AI, the motion, and the smart home integration… we might finally get the futuristic home assistant we’ve all been dreaming of.


Apple, just take my damn money already.



 
 
 

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© 2018 Rich Washburn

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